Busy Bee

Been awhile since I got some new projects to work on and recently I have been flooded. I had to make do with my time squeezing in relentless and persistent lonely peopleinto my schedule. Some hassle junkie I have been involved with, I had to cheer him/her up because it seems the whole world is collapsing on him/her. I know, I do not have to be responsible for anybody. It is not my job to save the world or save the people from their own depression. But, yeah, I am probably just a pushover. So, I am reading the book again "I feel guilty when I say NO." A gift from an old friend a long time ago. I should just not care about anybody, this way I would finish all my tasks and not have to be pissed at all with myself.

I have finished three projects so far and there still are two with looming deadlines in a few weeks or days I think. I wish I have enough time.

I have been trying to lose weight and cutting out some food but I always, always end up eating too much at night. Although my weight stayed the same for like 6 months now, I really need to lose 10 kilos to fit in my old clothes because I have no plans on buying new clothes. I want to live with what I have till the next four years so I save enough money to make myself feel like I am worth something and not just some nut case who sqaunders what she earns and grows into a forty year old who has nothing to her name but her shoes. Oh, lamentation of a woman whose has gone past the calendar days.

I had to see my dermatologist for some skin infection and I have been scheduled to do some surgery and facial cleaning this week. He is a good doctor. I asked him if he knows any good dentist and he told me his wife is a dentist and that she is a better doctor than her. So I went to her, whose office was just next building. I waited and waited and fidgeted and read a few pages off the book I just mentioned above. When it was my time to see her, she told me, "oh Dr. Derma takes care of you too much. He has called twice to check if you came to see me," I just smiled. I always feel like maybe wives would think there is something fishy going on. And so, I sat on that dentist-patient chair and she asked me a few stuff. Then she told me she will put injection. Now, I was scared. I was like, shit, she must have thought that there is something going on with her husband and me. Is that why she is giving me that injection??? OMG!! well, she was just actually doing her job. She did an x-ray on my forsaken tooth that I really wanted to be extracted since years ago which most dentists refused to do so. Why do they have to save a tooth that has been refilled several times and the patient has been complaining about again and again? I always ge tthe same response everytime I go to a different dentist.

So, I have my appointment tomorrow with the dermatologist for some surgery and my dentist appointment on Wednesday, hopefully she will agree to remove my tooth.

I miss that look from someone that tells you you are so special. I wonder when I will get that look again?

Huh?? Where did that come from?

So, I was still on that dentist-patient's chair (there has to be a name for this?) when she told me to open my mouth. She looked at my upper palate and poked into it and then she told me "You have a unique palate, it is beautiful. Just beautiful." I was like, 'thank you' ? huh? What do you reply to that exactly??

So, I got a bag for my birthday. It was a gift from Sarah. I also got a pair of earrings with something orange hanging on it.

I miss going out for shisha. I miss swimming. I miss snorkeling. I miss shopping. Yeah, I miss a lot of things.